Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I have a reading level above third grade

What do you typically do while on meth?

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I actually pay taxes

If I get served by someone else's papers, am I legally required to inform the person that they got served, or the court that they served the wrong person?

I don’t buy bullshit

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

What is a good habit and what is bad one?

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I have BPD. Why do I destroy everyone I love?

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

Which is the most liked web series in India?

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

Is there scientific evidence for reincarnation? If so, how does it work and can it be proven through regression therapy?

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I can count

Do interviewers discriminate against a candidate if he or she is overweight (assuming physical fitness is NOT part of the job requirements)?

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

What is the STAR interview method?

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

Can a twin flame runner be happy in a karmic relationship?

I understand how hurricane paths work

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I can read

How is bestiality wrong, but killing animals for sport or trophies is considered okay?

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I see through liars

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I have complete contempt for fakery

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I don’t cotton to rapists

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet